Taming the Tongue

but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.

(James 3:8)

We probably all know people who are very good at tearing people down. They seem to get a perverse pleasure in reducing someone to a whimpering pile of emotional scar tissue. They never have to physically touch their victims however, the injuries they cause can go deeper than a bullet fired from close range. They might be a parent or a job supervisor. They may even be a member of our church, but they are all poisonous to our psyche. They make us feel worthless, like we never do anything right.

Now, of course, we have social media to add a whole new platform for the sharp and cutting tongue. People we have never even met, sometime from the other side of the world, will thrust their painful insults at us, for the slightest infraction of their sensibilities. There are many instances of this new form of poisonous tongue, called cyber bullying, that has caused sensitive children, and even some adults, to commit suicide. They could no longer stand the constant barrage of put downs from the bullying taunts of some unseen monster.

We’ve passed laws, circulated petitions, marched in the streets, and started information campaigns to make people aware of how hurtful a poisonous tongue can be. Those are futile efforts and will never succeed. If we haven’t done so in recorded history we’re not going to tame the evil human tongues now. Anyone can use their tongues to either build someone up or tear them down. We don’t even have to present to be harmed by an evil tongue. Those that gossip behind our backs are as guilty as if they thrust a knife into us.

None of us are immune from having a poisonous tongue. All of us are guilty. With the same mouth we bless God, we curse our brother and sister. We have all said something that deeply hurt someone else, whether or not we meant to. Even though our tongues can be used as a weapon, we can overcome our tendency to hurt someone with the help of Jesus Christ. Only he can keep our wicked tongues from spreading poison. Only he is able to tame our wild and poisonous tongues and keep them in check. It takes giving our lives over to his lordship and following him with all our hearts. It means constantly checking what we’re about to say. If it might even possibly hurt someone else, we shouldn’t say it.

Heavenly Father, you know our every thought before we even think it. You love us even though we are so far beneath you. Your Word is the light we look to, to find your will. Our tongues can be as sharp as a razor, Lord, and can leave deep wounds in anyone who gets in the way. We know this because we have been the recipients of those wounds, and they hurt terribly. We remember wondering how anyone could say such hurtful things about us. Help us now to make a vow never to poison anyone the same way. Because we know how painful it can be, help us to train ourselves to say things that only build each other up. When we’re tempted to criticize, give us words of encouragement instead. Remove from our thoughts any desire to gossip or to spread stories about anyone. Father our thoughts are only evil most of the time, so don’t let us speak with our mouths what our minds are thinking. Take all the hateful words from our vocabularies and replace them with those that are loving and kind. In Jesus’ name, we pray. Amen!